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Long distance love

by Sarah Horrocks Published on 12 August 2008

Distant relationships aren't always easy. However, a few very simple basics can help you deal with separation in the best possible way. Here are some tips on making a long distance relationship work.

Having a relationship from a distance isn't always easy. However, a few very simple rules can help you deal with separation in the best possible way.

Here are some tips on making a long distance love work.

Set your terms

Both of you have to agree to the terms of your relationship and know what you want from it if your romance is going to survive the distance.

It depends how long you've been together: if you've been together for 1 month or 5 years, your expectations and the way you handle the separation will be different.

So together you need to establish rules and, if possible, decide how long you will be apart, how often you will see each other and what your needs are. This way, you'll know exactly what to expect and you won't be disappointed if things don't work out.

Make the most of the time you have together

Don't put pressure on yourself by building up expectations when you're going to see each other. Real life isn't like the movies.

If you fantasise about those long-awaited moments too much, you could end up disappointed. Take things as they come, because they never happen as we imagine.

Enjoy your time together to the max, without getting upset when he doesn't meet you off the train with a huge bunch of flowers. Weekends and holidays go very quickly, so try and put your worries to one side. Whatever the circumstances, wherever you are, the important thing is that you're together.

How to deal with being apart

Even if you're impatient to see your loved one, your life shouldn't just revolve around the times when you're together.

If you don’t want your separation to become a nightmare or a source of sadness, it’s essential that each of you have your own lives as well, not just to give you balance but simply so that you live your life to the full when he's not there.

Your interests, friends and family will allow you to fill the time before you see him again and the absence will feel less noticeable.

Also, spending your life on the phone or checking your inbox doesn't make time go any quicker, so remember to live your life to the full and don't hold back.

Make plans

Nothing will help you keep the flame alive more than planning things together, from plans for your future together to short-term plans to see each other. Plan romantic weekends, holidays with friends or family get-togethers.

These little commitments will help keep the bond between you strong, while the thought of building a future together will help you cope with being apart.

by Sarah Horrocks

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